Wordiness Part 4

Wordiness Part 4

Commonly used phrases such as the fact that usually can be deleted.

Wordy: The fact that she lost her temper at yesterday’s meeting is indicative of her problems here.

Reduced: She lost her temper at yesterday’s meeting.

Individual or Small-Group Activity

Delete extra words in the following sentences.

    1. It has been shown that Brand X usually outperforms Brand Y in sports commercials.
    2. It is recognized that Don Jones is a leader in motivational speaking.
    3. What is known as a hyperthesis is a statement that usually says What because Why.
    4. It is worthy to note that Crystal is a mother of six honor-roll students.
    5. What I first would like to say is that Harold Kranz has been my friend for five decades.

Individual or Class Activity

Reduce the following.

    1. it is the intention of this writer to
    2. in the majority of cases
    3. at this point of time
    4. after the conclusion of
    5. can be in a position to
    6. in regard to
    7. in the event that
    8. in the very near future
    9. make a recommendation that
    10. of a confidential nature
    11. perform an analysis of
    12. absolutely perfect
    13. an honor and a privilege
    14. basic essentials
    15. first and foremost
    16. goals and objectives
    17. personal opinion
    18. in the year 1995
    19. true facts
    20. sincerely yours

Individual or Small-Group Activity

Reduce the following to no more than the number in parenthesis.  Do not change the meaning. Each result must be one sentence. Remember: Strong verbs reduce wordiness.  Count St. as a word.  Assume an audience unfamiliar with the Caribbean.

    1. The island of St. Lucia, surrounded by water, was probably first discovered in the year 1500. (10)
    2. First and foremost, let me say that Rainforest Rides is St. Lucia’s newest exciting amazing sensational thrill in the tours for tourists department. (9)
    3. The favorite sport of St. Lucia is cricket. It is a fantastic bat and ball game played by a total of two teams of 11 players each. (17)
    4. In the year 1659, a territorial dispute over Saint Lucia’s ownership arose between the country of France and the country of England, which by this time had established a base of operations on the island of Barbados. (20)
    5. The slaves of the island were set free following the end of the French Revolution yet were once more again placed back into slavery when the British again captured the island. (19)

Individual or Small-Group Activity

Complete the exercises:       Idaho



Optional Activity